40w1d & progress update

Made it to my due date yesterday and he's still not here.  I've been super busy the past few weeks especially since my parents arrived on the 27th.  So, this post will be a bit of a 'thought vomit' one but I thought that I'd give all my readers an update.

• Blood pressure is still good for this stage of pregnancy at 118/78 but I'm a bit bummed it is so close to normal ... because my blood pressure is always on the low side.  But that is to be expected.  
• Still technically working and was in the office Friday.  People seem to think I'm nuts but when I explain I don't want to come back from mat leave too close to New Years' 2013 they get it.  
• Had 10 days off over Christmas and New Year's and went back on January 3rd.  That's the earliest I've EVER gone back to work in the new year.  Felt really weird.
• Finally got some decorating finished but I had to stop because my parents were about to arrive.

• Had a really weird Christmas Day.  I had a nap in the afternoon and didn't do much of anything at all.  
• I got all my cookies made but have one more batch sitting in the fridge.  Didn't manage to get the pies done so unfortunately my mom had to make them.  
• Had Christmas meals on New Year's Even and New Year's Day.  Felt a lot more like Christmas after that even though I missed out on the usual stuff and seeing my niece and nephew back home.  Next year will be better including for my sister who spent 3 hours in the ER because of a wacky serious eye infection that was progressing really fast.  Merry Christmas Eve to her!  
• Finally met my primary midwife now that she is back from leave.  Feels really weird to meet her so close to delivery but it can't be any worse than going to the hospital and getting some random OB, right?
• Parents arrived on the 27th and we've been busy since.
• The baby's room is ready to go now that we've gotten the finishing touches in.  Dresser and rocking chair are ready.  Thank you Ik.ea!  One bookshelf needs to come out and moved into the other bedroom up front.
• My house is being fitted with all kinds of shelving, all over the place.  My townhouse will have the best shelving in the suburb, I kid you not.  ;-)
• Cloth diapers are washed and ready to go thanks to my mom.  She didn't realize they should be dried between washes but luckily I caught that after the second wash and they got fluffed up nicely.
• Have 2 types of cloth diapers to try out - Indian prefolds and some microfibre ones made at a local baby store.  My mom has offered to make me more microfibre ones if she can find out what is in them.  That would be awesome!  
• Tons of freezing rain here since the week before Christmas including 2 days on which I had midwife appointments.  Made it out to the clinic no problem by driving responsibly.  ;-)
• Unfortunately, tested positive for Gr.oup B Str.ep.  Really not happy about this because I'm allergic to penicillin and clindamycin.  My only option is vancomycin and that's nasty stuff.  So, we're going to see how things go and if there are no warning signs we're going to do this without antibiotics.  Fingers crossed my water doesn't break before going to the hospital.
• Changed the hospital I'm going to because of GB.S results.  I'm now going out of town.  Pre-registered last Wednesday and it felt a lot like going into my home town hospital except the old one was multi-storied and this is a more recently built 1 storey building.  Will be a longer drive but I think we'll get excellent care there if we need to be in more than a few hours.

And now for the progress update:

• At my midwife appointment on Wednesday I was 2 cm dilated with little effacement.  While I've been told that is good for 39 weeks I was a bit bummed I wasn't further along.  Met the brand new student midwife who is working with my primary.  She will be at my birth and I think that will be her first one in this practicum so exciting stuff for her.  
• Had cramps Wednesday night.  My mom wanted me to come upstairs for just a few minutes (she's an organizing junkie ... no appearance on hoarding for her, ever!) and that turned into 45 minutes.  And, of course, it was during the only show that's been on TV worth watching in the past 2 months and wasn't repeated until 11 pm that night.  I repeatedly told my mom I couldn't keep doing stuff because I was crampy.  So I finally stopped at 9 (after missing 45 minutes of the show).  It didn't stop until about 11.  Apparently my mom thought I meant my legs were crampy.  Um, no.  I've never had crampy legs in my life even with a nasty flu.  I meant contraction type cramps.  Decided to stay home Thursday just in case.  I didn't want to try to find out how to get home while having contractions if that happened.
• Spent a lazy Thursday at home and felt much better.  Baby was very active that day since I was relaxing.
• Went to work Friday and had more cramping, particularly in the morning.  Getting stressed out about new stuff coming up at work and inability to get things on my list done before going on leave.  Taking Monday off because I'm too tired to work more than 4 days a week.  
• Noticed something a little different about the discharge yesterday morning.  Wondered whether it was a bit blood tinged but it might not have been so I didn't think too much about it.  Went shopping and when I came home I had bloody show and my mucous plug had definitely started to come out.  Yay!  Progress!  Had difficulty falling asleep.
• Overnight, not much to report.  Bloody show and mucous plug continuing to come out.  Had major discomfort after getting back to bed after going to the bathroom at 3:30 and 8 am.  Took about 1/2 hour to go away. 
• This morning I had some bright red show and got a bit worried about it.  Got my mom to check ... yes, very lovely, but she's used to working with bodily fluids and tissue so it wasn't weird for her at all.  She thought it looked like a clot or maybe some mucous.  Decided to wait and see.
• Show turned brownish again so put off call to midwife.  Then it turned a bit red again so called my doula.  She said this was fine and as long as the bright red stuff wasn't more than the volume of a light period I was fine.  
• Baby has been quiet today after a very active night.  He's definitely moved from his curled spot to bum out behind my belly button.  This is starting to get really uncomfortable, especially when he moves.  
• Continuing show this afternoon.  Spent most of it on the couch because every time I'm on my feet I get really uncomfortable.  Baby is definitely much further down than he was on Thursday.  The ultrasound to check where his head is and fluid levels (because my m/w was a bit concerned) probably won't be necessary because I think he's really far down now.  
• Likely to use my TENS machine tonight just to make sure I can get some sleep.  
• Feeling what is likely mild, erratic contractions.  It is hard for me to tell because I usually get extremely painful menstrual cramps and what is simply uncomfortable for me is really painful for someone else.  

So, after all that I'm thinking this guy is going to arrive sooner this week than later.  And I'm really hoping before Thursday because my dad has to leave to go back to work.  Bummer.  So my fingers are crossed I go into labour soon and with all the progress I've had over the past couple days I'm sure I'm more than 2 cm dilated now.  That makes me very happy!

Anyway, took the last set of belly photos, or what I think will be the last ones, today.  So, here you go:

I should have taken more photos in the bathroom ... better light from the south facing windows to use the camera without the flash.

36 weeks

Yes, I've become that poster, the one with the boring weekly updates and apparently no thoughts other than 'this is where I am'.  lol

My latest m/w appointment went well even if it had to be postponed a day because of a birth.  Not mine, obviously.  I met another m/w in the practice and it could be one of the 2 who will attend my birth.  We went over a few items, will do the GBS test next week, and got a requisition for an u/s.  She was certain his head was down but because she felt his feet and legs in a weird spot, running across my belly, she wanted to make sure what she was feeling was a head and not a bum.  His h/b was in the 140s but spiked to the 160s because he got annoyed when poked by the m/w.  His heart was fairly low in my belly so the m/w was sure that his head was low.  She was unable to get a measurement past 34 weeks because I'm so short in the body.  My uterus is growing as my photos can attest but it has gotten to the point where they can't feel it past a 34 week measurement.  Just another oddity about my body. 

I had the u/s on Friday.  Baby is measuring on time, exactly 35w6d that day.  His h/b was in the 130s that day.  He was busy practice breathing which I couldn't really detect on the u/s screen so I just took the tech's word for it.  The u/s did confirm that he is head down (yay!) and that his legs are in a bit of a weird position.  He seems to keep them in a jacknife position or sort of like an Olympic diver's pike position.  That would likely explain why my belly doesn't protrude an awful lot for 36 weeks and why the m/w thought it felt like he was sitting across my belly.  Baby's estimated weight was 5lbs 1oz on Friday but I know that is notoriously unreliable so I'm trying to pretend that this number really isn't important especially since his measurements land him exactly on time for his January 7th due date.  I was a typical 7 lbs something and the donor was too so maybe he'll be just the same.  Or maybe he'll pack on the fat between now and delivery date and I'll end up with a 9 pounder.  Who knows?  This is one thing that is hard to guess. 

I'm starting to feel the fatigue a little more now.  If I sit down and don't get up after supper I just don't get up.  Suits little T just fine since he gets lots of cuddling time in but I'm not getting much done.  I already warned my parents that my house may be disorganized and in need of a good cleaning and I'm really sorry about that.  I'm doing my best but there are things I just can't do any longer. 

I did manage to get the garland and lights up the banister and complete it last night.  Took 2 days' worth of work spread over 2 weekends to do it but it is now done.  That takes the place of a tree this year.  I want to decorate it up a bit but if I don't get that done it isn't the end of the world.  At least the lights are woven into it.  It took a lot longer than I thought it would.  I had to twist strands of garland together to make it fuller, then twist ends of others in to connect them (~36 feet in total), hang it, then put the lights in.  The steps on the staircase make for good seating to do the lights.  lol  It ended up running a couple feet short upstairs but very few people will see that so I don't care. 

Okay, that's it for now.  I am supposed to have my shower tomorrow so I'm sure I'll have updatable info at that point.  And info on my shopping trip to Ik.ea for baby room stuff.  My life is so exciting this month.  lol

In which I have an emotional breakdown

Things came to a head Thursday when I spoke to my cat's vet.  Some of her blood work is better than last year but one of the tests is not good but we don't yet know what is wrong with her.  It could be a continuing kidney issue, a new thyroid thing or cancer.  She already has a major constipation problem that is causing her more trouble every year.  Our necessary trip to the vet cost $500 on Saturday and the vet said the tests her partner would like to perform to figure out what is going on would come to $1000.  I don't have that kind of money.  Yes, I have a good job and I get great OT pay when I travel but I had planned on having a certain amount of money in my account when I go on leave.  I've barely put anything away for retirement this year (we get a nifty tax break until we turn 71 and have to pull it out) and I want to make sure I have something set aside for things like putting up the fence and unexpected things while on mat leave not to mention next year's retirement savings.  I have issues with money, well not actual issues, but fears about not having enough money.  Always have and I'm sure I always will so I freak whenever something like this happens.

Kitty is 16 or so we think.  We don't actually know.  I've had her for 8 1/2 years so I'm not sure where she was before I got her from the shelter but for those 8 1/2 years she's had a good life.  I can't justify putting her through crazy treatments if she has cancer.  She's 16!  Maybe if she were young like my sister's cat. I think he was about 4 or 5 when he was diagnosed and treated for stomach cancer.  The vet college used a novel treatment and he went into remission.  He's now 16.  But my cat?  I don't want to torture her.  She gets so stressed out when we go to the vet.  She went to our current vet at Thanksgiving last year because she was very sick and I had to work away for a week.  Turns out she was horribly constipated and the meds the previous vet had ordered weren't really working.  We also discovered some kidney and pancreas issues as well as past hepatitis.  And she had to board there for a week to get medical care while I was away.  So, kitty gets super upset when we go to the vet now.  I cannot put her through what would be sheer torture for her only to appease my desire to keep her alive longer.  If it turns out she has cancer I want to know the prognosis and figure out how to make her as comfortable and happy as possible until it is better that she leave us. But I still can't help but feel that I'm somehow betraying her by not trying to treat whatever it turns out to be, even cancer.

She had follow up tests today, urine and a calcium test that is supposed to be more definitive.  She had to stay with the vets all day and needed another enema because she is still constipated.  She hasn't used the litter yet.  That set me back another $400.  I'm hoping this test shows something because I'd like a diagnosis and treatment plan before the vet wants me to add another $700 to the bill.

I just lost it last night.  My good appointment with the midwife seems to have gone out the window.  I know that she'll work with me to find out what is best for me and what I want to plan for.  I'll still be responsible for all the decisions but at least I'll feel like I've got someone to lean on.  Then I still have my horribly messy house that is still horribly unorganized.  I feel so behind on that.  Every time I walk into the baby's room I cringe at how much I have to get out of there and organize.  I had trouble adding items to my registry last week.  So much was scanning wrong.  No, I did not add pink anything thank you.  And no, I really didn't add the hooded towel with cars.  I chose the one with the ducks on it for pete's sake.  And I didn't get down there until it was my niece's bad time (mid-afternoon) so she was freaking out.  My mom and sister were wandering around somewhere else.  I wanted their help and I was totally overwhelmed.  How am I supposed to know what to add to my registry, especially breastfeeding gear?  My mom didn't BF us and my sister is the only one close enough for me to ask.  I wasn't going to ask the teenager stocking the shelves what she recommends.  I don't know what else to add but I know I'm missing things I should probably get.  And I have no idea how I'm going to pay for everything.  And that doesn't even include choosing the car seat ...

I'm ticked off at the city for their stupid water main failure and repair earlier this year.  Necessary?  Yes.  Badly timed?  Absolutely.  It rained heavily all of April but then went completely dry just in time for a 3 month water ban while they fixed the water main.  My lawn looks awful, it is embarrassing really.  I'm trying to get new seed to grow in what was supposed to be a cool wet week.  Rain?  Not a single drop all week?  Cool?  Not bad until today when it hit 25 and 29 with the humidity.  I feel like stopping my efforts and just ripping the whole stupid thing out next year and sending the bill to the city.  I'm going to have to move up my perennial transformation plan for the front yard to next year and dump a bunch of decent soil in there to counteract the stupid beach I have under my dead grass.  *sigh*  But I think some decorative stone and succulents like sedum and chick and hens should be easy enough to plant and they'll be fine in the searing summer heat. No matter what the grass at the bottom of the front yard is coming out next year.  Period.

I just lost it last night.  I'm feeling so overwhelmed.  I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing.  I need help but have no one to help me and when they are supposed to they don't do it.  Were I living near my parents I would have been on the phone late last night an emotional wreck.  I was even willing to pay to have my mom fly out just to be here to help for a week. 

The good news is that baby is measuring on time.  The MW broke out the measuring tape for the first time and she said I was measuring 23 weeks so right on schedule.  Baby's heartbeat was in the 150s and was easier to find this time.  And my urine test strip was clear of glucose.  So that was positive. As well as the philosophy of the practice.  I want the least amount of intervention possible while still recognizing that things happen and if I need a c-section so be it.  Just don't ask me to stay on my back during labour, thank you very much.  The midwives won't make me do that, thankfully. 

Even so I just lost it last night ... completely.

Okay, I have to add this new blogging format is really ticking me off.  I managed to delete 3 paragraphs of this entry with a single mistype.  WTF?  This new format doesn't seem to save automatically as often as the old one did.

How did this turn out to be more like thought vomit than a coherent post?

Midwife appointment Thursday

This wasn't the fun post I thought I'd be making but I got hold of the midwifery practice this morning and I'm meeting my midwife on Thursday afternoon!  Well, the one who is currently filling in for the midwife who will be there for delivery.  I feel a bit odd developing a relationship with a midwife who isn't scheduled to be there for the birth but this is a large, joint practice so it isn't unusual for more than one midwife to be involved in a mom-to-be's care. 

They didn't balk when I told them my health issues during the initial screening phone call many months ago ... I think I called within a week of being released from the RE and I still ended up on a waiting list because my due date falls at the end of the Christmas/New Year's vacation period.  I've got my fingers crossed that my PCOS, which seems to have taken a temporary hiatus during pregnancy (yippee!), holds off and doesn't give me the usual potential complications such as gestational diabetes or pre-eclampsia.  I really want to remain under the care of a midwife until baby arrives.  But I guess I should look at the bright side.  If I do need to be under an OB's care at the end the midwife is supposed to follow me through right to post-partum check ups.  She doesn't just pass me off to an OB.  She is supposed to be there for delivery just as much as if she and her partner ('cause apparently they have 2 in the room at the crucial moment) were caring for me alone.  At least that is what the website says.  I'll get more info at my first appointment on Thursday. 

I still don't have a huge appetite but notice that I'm enjoying the carbs more this week which has resulted in a severely distended belly.  I don't think the PCOS agrees with the carbs even in pregnancy.  So, I think I've got to manage that a little better.  I refuse to gain 50 pounds during the last 4 1/2 months of pregnancy because I got lazy.  But before I started this carb fest I could tell that the belly was finally starting to pop albeit not that much.  (Just don't count today which was severely affected by post-carb absorption PCOS gut reaction.)  Here is a shot from Sunday at 22w1d.

Belly at 22w1d

Kitty wanted to be in the picture too ... especially after the vet drama.  lol

Next post?  Can't promise I'll be able to update you on the midwife appointment Thursday because I have a meeting that evening.  I do hope to update everyone about it as soon as I can plus add a post about the fun stuff that I've received or purchased ... and the niece and nephew.  ;-)

Midwives and wildlife

I called the midwifery practice that covers my area and the good news is that they are just now taking clients with January due dates.  Based on the information I gave I was told that I have a good chance of getting in with them.  This practice has weekly meetings and based on the information given over the phone they set up consultations with potential clients and go from there.  So now I have to wait for 2-3 weeks to hear back.  If I don't hear back then I have to call them.  If I'm not accepted I'll still be kept on the list and could get the call at any time right up until my due date. 

In other news, I had an interesting night.  I had a raccoon try to break in through my bedroom window. I woke up hearing this scratching sound.  I thought my cat was clawing the carpet outside the bedroom door so I turned over and ignored it. Then I thought, maybe it is my not so temporary paper blinds that are blowing in the breeze.  I opened my eyes to see if they were moving and I see this shadow in the window.  I think, what is my cat doing up there in the window?  Then I realize there's no way she'd be in my room because my door was closed.  And then I realized that there is no way for her to jump up on the window sill.  No way because it is too high.

I panicked thinking 'what the hell is that?'.  I go over to the window quickly and look at this creature stretched up all the way to the bottom of my blinds and low and behold I'm looking into the face of a raccoon!  OMG!  I made some noise and it ran away but, sh*t!  Talk about a heart attack at 2:30 in the morning.  At that point I closed my window which I really didn't want to do because it was so hot last night but I didn't want the creature coming back to break in. This morning I noticed that the screen had been pushed in a bit and had those blinds not been partially down I'm sure that screen would have popped right off and I would have had a crazy raccoon in my bedroom.

And now for your viewing pleasure ... the little bean.

My little bean at 6w5d.  The yolk sac is on the upper right.

I had to figure out how to use my scanner and download some options into the machine from my computer before I could use it.  Pretty slick and faster than my old scanner.