Monday, June 13, 2011

10w2d ... and a name vent

And the night before the ultrasound.  I am so nervous we're going to find a problem or there will be no heartbeat.  I've had nothing happen that makes me think this other than the bleeding on Friday.  My symptoms haven't changed in the least.  I'm continuing to feel stretching pains in my pelvis so things must be expanding as they should. 

I know that a good u/s tomorrow doesn't mean everything will be okay.  I'm still only 25% through this pregnancy.  Yes, crazy ... I'm 25% through this already!  But that still means I've got a long road ahead.  But I really want to get some good results tomorrow.  I feel like if everything is okay this week I'll feel more comfortable spilling the beans at the end of the month. 

In other news my nephew finally has a name.  To make a long story short no one in our family likes his first name and we'll come up with a nickname for him. It rhymes with his last name and he is going to be mercilessly teased.  My BIL vetoed everything my sister suggested and pushed for the name he wanted years ago.  Even though the agreement was that my sister got to pick this time since he got to choose my niece's name.  But of course he lies and tells everyone that since my sister had such a horrible experience with my niece's birth that SHE was the one who got to choose her name ... and this one's name.  The truth eventually comes out, d*ckhead.  When my mom went up to the hospital to see little C with my niece, my mom asked about his name.  My BIL basically said his name is C but mommy just has to come around to the idea.  WTF?

And what the heck is wrong with my sister?  Where did her stubbornness go?  That's a whole other topic.

They had no middle name picked out at that point and we all had to wait.  And what did they do?  Yet again they chose a name that has meaning to ME, nothing to do with them.  But of course, my BIL probably likes it because it is rare in North America.  That seems to be his only criteria for a suitable name.  Must be why he put a star beside the name Ebab in their baby names book.  (serious rolling of eyes here)  They chose one of the names of my host brothers in Denmark.  I would love to use the name of one of them (not this one, though) because I really like it and I think it is very traditionally Scandinavian but translates well in North America.  But I'd never use it because it would be weird, especially because there are 3 brothers.  Why choose one and leave the others out.

I'm also mad because this brother is in the army and he could be sent to Afghanistan soon.  What happens if he dies there?  I can't also name my child after him to honour him because my sister and BIL beat me to it. Yet again.  And my sister knows full well that I've been trying to get pregnant.  So much for keeping my pregnancy a secret from them to be nice.  (Where's a confused smiley face when you need it?)

That's the short story.  I'll leave out all the other garbage about my selfish, childish BIL and sister and the garbage we had to deal with on our big family vacation to Denmark last year.  But needless to say it all plays into this.

I'm just pissed.

2 comments:

  1. Fingers crossed that everything goes well tomorrow!

    And yes, although you have a long way to go yet with the pregnancy, the odds of it going well continue to go up... so if you make it out of the first trimester safely, your odds are very good, indeed!

    so in that sense, you are more than 25% there... I think if you get out the 1st trimester, you have a 95% chance of having a baby.

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  2. Thanks Abby. I just keep telling myself that over and over. And the head of the clinic who saw me before releasing me said I had a 95% chance after that 1st ultrasound.

    I guess I'm just a little paranoid after the m/c earlier this year. I also grew up knowing that bad things can happen during pregnancy as my mom had a loss in her 6th month of pregnancy. I've never been naive about it.

    (Just keep thinking positive thoughts ... :-) )

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